Is Divorcing Later In Life Right For You?

Divorcing later in life is more common than most people realize. People divorce in their 50s and 60s for a variety of reasons. While some have been postponing divorce for years, others wake up one random day and discover they have grown apart from their spouse, years ago.

Waiting For the Kids to Leave

There are some couples who are divorcing later in life because they have waited for their last child to finally go off to college. Many couples feel that divorce is less disruptive for their children once they are past the age of 18. Women in particular feel that once their children are out of the house, it is finally their turn to do something for themselves that is personally gratifying. Empty nest can come into play at this stage of life.

Making Your Last Year Your Best Years

Others in midlife take stock of the quality, or lack of it, in their lives. I have heard many clients express the awareness that they may only have 20 years left in life, and they want to live them more happily. Sometimes this is triggered by the death of a contemporary.

Recapturing Old Feelings

There is a third group of people who divorce later in life to try and recapture the feelings they had in their 20s and 30s. More than once I have heard a client say they had reconnected with someone they knew in high school or college on Facebook. Often times, they have not really fallen in love with the person they knew years ago, but they have fallen in love with the feelings they used to have when they were thirty years younger.

How To Avoid Divorcing Later In Life

Divorcing later in life is a serious decision. No one wants the last child to leave, only to find themselves married to a stranger. But no one wants to make such an important change and learn to regret it either. The answer to this is to keep your marriage fresh throughout your married life, to make it everything you want it to be. Every day. If you put your children first, or if you put work first, the odds are pretty great that your marriage will suffer, or at least feel very lonely.