Advocacy Circle Marriage & Infidelity Counseling

Overcoming Loneliness During the Holidays


This time of the year can be an especially challenging if you are feeling emotionally fenced in, vulnerable or isolated. The last two years have been tough. We’ve had to accept a certain normalization of isolation and waves of social distancing.

Now that you may be slowly re-emerging and are participating in large family gatherings, work parties and social invitations once again it’s hard to imagine rolling lockdowns again.

But, if you happen to find yourself alone, we have some ideas of how to stave off the blues over the next few months.

1. Keep active and creative

For instance, take this opportunity to get outdoors and go hiking or running. Learn the guitar or piano. Start journaling. It doesn’t matter what you decide. What’s most important is that you feel a sense of satisfaction, distraction and productivity.

Escapism during the holiday season is perfectly acceptable as well. Binge watch “Squid Game” or “Fast and Furious” on Netflix.

2. Hit the road

Take that trip to Utah you’ve been talking about and camp out under the stars. Or drive the Pacific Coastal Highway in California and get lost in the Redwood Forest. The USA has so many National Parks that are a camper’s or hiker’s dream, even during the winter. A change of scenery will often allow time for self-reflection and give way to a positive and healthy change in perspective.

You may find yourself taking an overdue inventory of all the errant items in your life that have been stockpiling or zeroing in on things that have been neglected.

3. Be of service

Find a worthy cause or community program that you believe in and give back to your community in some meaningful way.

This is not just to feel better about yourself, but more about aligning, or even partnering, with those creating positive and lasting change.

This is a good time to look at all you’ve been given and pay it forward.

The benefits will ripple outward in your life and hopefully you will see how to do even more within your community, or perhaps even globally.

Some other considerations

Just know that you are not alone in your aloneness, whatever you decide to do. People all around you are quietly going about lives too. They may be celebrating small victories or accepting bitter defeats. You just can’t know which. They are most likely forging ahead, tapping into inner reserves of strength and understanding, just like you.

Every season marks another year you’ve endured and borne witness to the wonders of this world. We must all be seasoned by time, and we must move through it.

Find and give peace where and when you can. That is the best gift you can give or receive, as the years recede behind you or stretch out before you.